Meet the Snort Monsters

Jeff Loftus

Aireen Monster

Angel Snort Monster

Briggs Snort Monster

Winston Snort Monster

Snort Monsters Old Timer

Jeff Loftus

Monster of Operations

Ice cream: A simple man enjoys simple things like cherry-vanilla ice cream. Though, if it is in shake form, it has to be strawberry.
TV show: Growing up, I was glued to CHiPs. My attention has since turned to zombies and The Walking Dead.
Hobbies: Cooking, motorcycles, and keeping a smile on Aireen’s face
Thing to wear: Jeans and a polo, button-down, or t-shirt, and of course argyle socks!
Colors: Blue and red
Movie: Hot Fuzz “The little hand says it’s time to rock-n-roll.”
Shoe size: Nine point none
Monsters growing up: We had a zoo. There was Peepers and Donald Duck, Gertie the Guard Goose, Buffy the Bunny, and Hazel the Guinea Pig. Then there was Poofie and Scruffy, who were two poodle/schnauzer-mixed monsters. Now my monster void is filled with Angel, the first Boston I got to know.
Fun facts:
• Once jumped from a moving vehicle to see what it was all about.
• Was lit on fire, by a friend.
• Has a nearly defeated high-school wrestling record of 1W-10L.



Aireen Arellano

Monster of Design

Ice cream: Coffee. And peanut parfaits. (BRB GETTING SOME NOW.)
TV show: Get Smart, Mission: Impossible, I Love Lucy, Taxi, The Walking Dead, Mad Men, The Dick van Dyke Show (Yes, I am 65 years old.)
Hobbies: Instagramming, designing, baking cupcakes, playing and watching a tennis match or two, shaking up craft cocktails and blogging about it
Thing to wear: A cozy, well-designed graphic tee, skinny jeans, and boots with bold jewelry.
Colors: Teal/turquoise, red, and hot pink.
Movie: ‘Back to the Future’
Shoe size: 7.5
Monsters growing up: A goldfish named Jenny, a stray black cat (for a day before Mom and Dad made me let her go), a stray blue jay my grandma nursed back to health, a Boston Terrier named Alex who was my very first Snort Monster and who was a cute but ornery little lady, a long-haired dachshund named Max who was the most soulful little creature I’ve ever met, and a Boston Terrier named Angel who is the sweetest, most affectionate and hilarious Snort Monster I’ve ever met.
Fun facts:
• Signed up for beauty school before finally following her calling to go to art and design school.
• Has enjoyed an evening of tequila shots with Greg Nicotero and Norman Reedus of The Walking Dead.
• Has had stitches on her tongue after cutting it with glass. (Note made to self at 6 years old: DO NOT bite glass while drinking from it.)




Monster of Snorting

Ice cream: n/a (womp womp)
TV show: Magnum P.I.
Hobbies: Car rides, going out, enjoying couch time and cuddle time in bed with Jeff and Aireen, chasing squirrels and rabbits, destroying stuffed squeaky animals, and cuddling with boyfriend Briggs
Thing to wear: A simple and elegant strand of pearls.
Colors: Blue, which is the color of her latest stuffed conquest, a now squeak-less lizard.
Movie: ‘Back to the Future.’
Paw size: Wittle.
Monsters growing up: Max was my fellow monster brother who did not like me at first but who grew to love me. We were great cuddle buddies together.
Fun facts:
• Loves cheese and scrambled eggs when Mom and Dad lets her have some.
• Can play dead and react to a double tap when you point your hand as a gun and say, “Bang!”
• Other tricks include “Leave it,” “Speak!” “Roll over,” “Fist bump,” and balancing a treat on her nose before catching it at the release command.




Monster of Snorting and Angel’s boyfriend

Ice cream: n/a Anything too cold makes my tummy hurt! But if I could have ice cream, my favorite flavor would be bacon or cheese. . . or bacon AND cheese!
TV show: I don’t have a favorite TV show, but I do enjoy watching NBA basketball. All those humans look like they’re having so much fun running back and forth chasing the ball.
Hobbies: Eating and playing in the snow in the winter and eating flowers and napping in the sun in the summer. Ripping all of my toys to shreds. Drooling on unsuspecting strangers. Playing tug of war with my owners.
Thing to wear: I like to go au naturel, but during the winter, I don’t leave the apartment without my trusty snow boots and my snazzy blue coat.
Colors: Brown – the color of my kibble!
Movie: Love Actually because it proves that is love possible for everyone, as exemplified by my passionate loving relationship with Angel
Paw size: 3″
Monsters growing up: I have many friends in my apartment building and at my daycare that I like to play with. I also enjoy my many sleepovers with my lady, Angel. I hope to someday get a little brother that I can show the ropes.
Fun facts:
• I was named after a football player from my owners’ favorite team, the Chicago Bears. I was born on 5/5 and the football player’s jersey number is 55.
• Tricks include “Roll over” “Drop it” when playing fetch “Spin!” and “Head rest”




Monster of Snorting and Aireen’s fur brother

Ice cream: No ice cream allowed for this guy!
TV show: As a music fan, he thoroughly enjoys The Voice.
Hobbies: Chewing on his rawhide, watching TV with his mom and dad on the couch, and guarding the house by mean-mugging coyotes.
Thing to wear: A sturdy leather collar, which changes according to the season. (Speaking of which, it’s time to change collars!)
Colors: He’s a fan of leather, so he sticks with dark neutrals like tan or brown.
Movie: There are so many movies to name! But nothing stimulates the mind like a fresh indie flick.
Paw size: Clunky. He hates his winter boots, but now his mom and dad have stopped forcing the issue.
Monsters growing up: He gets REALLY EXCITED when Angel comes over to cower in fear – ahem – PLAY with Winston. Winston also occasionally sends over a friendly hello to a fellow walker.
Fun facts:
• Winston will give the perfect pout just enough to score some table food from his mom and dad at dinner.
• Nothing relaxes him like listening to his dad practice the piano. His personal favorites are etudes by Mozart and Chopin.



Old Timer

Monster of Construction and Angel’s papa

Ice cream: Chocolate, Chocolate, Chocolate!
TV show: Catching the latest series on ancient Egypt or aliens is great. Who knows, one day these could be the same series.
Hobbies: Woodworking. “If it’s wood, it’s good.”
Thing to wear: Blue jeans and a flannel.
Colors: Red, the color of my 1973 Honda CB350F
Movie: Any Bond is a good Bond.
Paw size: Clunky. 9-1/2
Monsters growing up: Spike, he was my bulldog buddy growing up.
Fun facts:
• Went hang gliding once. The flight ended at the hospital.
• Once buried a car in the back yard.